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I don't want to be understood

Call Number

  • 811 E776 (CEN)

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Publication Information

New Gloucester, Maine : Alice James Books, [2024]

Physical Description

79 pages ; 23 cm

Summary

"A transsexual woman pieces together fragmented details of a repressive religious childhood and an unsupportive family, drawing from autobiographical experiences of the poet's life. I Don't Want To Be Understood is a work of resistance against the conventional trans narrative, and a resistance against the idea that trans people should have to make themselves clear and understandable to others in order to deserve human rights. This is a compelling, urgent collection about the body and survival that asks how we learn to love in a culture where normal is defined by exclusion and discrimination. These poems stretch from childhood to the present day-resisting typical narratives of self-discovery, resilience, and personal growth-and instead ask what it means to be granted or denied personhood by the world around you. I Don't Want To Be Understood is a personal archive of a trans life laid out in all its messiness and unknowability, and is a book for anyone who has questioned why we place so many limitations on who gets to be considered a human being. These poems do not celebrate survival, but rather ask why transsexuals and other gender non-conforming people must fight so hard to survive in the first place"--

Contents

  • 1. violence is the scroll upon which her history is recorded. airport ritual
  • every day
  • personal statement
  • every morning i walk through a field
  • makeup ritual
  • questions for your admirer
  • the heat death of the universe
  • the threat
  • as he killed me i imagined him
  • i want to write a poem
  • return to light
  • warm
  • birthday suits
  • coming out
  • to my parents
  • snow
  • particulate matter
  • my freedom
  • my name
  • trans woman's first rental application
  • queering success
  • you're going to die today
  • poem
  • the blueness of the room
  • the front door
  • game animal
  • justification
  • time-lapse video of trans woman collapsing inward like a dying star
  • gangrenous love
  • how many colors there are vs. how many colors have been named
  • 2. and then came the naming. newsfeed
  • poem
  • housewife from planet x
  • poem
  • coercion road
  • a confession
  • a confession
  • childhood prayer
  • espinoza:
  • poem
  • resurrection
  • loss ritual
  • airport ritual
  • normal
  • real woman
  • where and what i am
  • we
  • how i make a poem
  • your weakness
  • today i was alone
  • i talked to that spirit again
  • this is what makes us worlds
  • memoir
  • the present
  • by the cemetery on pine
  • biography of a snowstorm
  • addendum
  • departure
  • it doesn't matter if i'm understood.